What I won't be doing this year (Part 2)

 What I won't be doing this year...

1. Stay quiet.

When I look back on how many times I've kept quiet when someone I care for has been mistreated I'm sickened. That's why I refuse to be bulldozed. Sitting back and going with the flow works for some people. Hats off to you, but this chic can't. I respect you for patience so please respect me for pointing out the "wrongs". This doesn't make me a bitch. Or "one of those people". 

2. Make excuses.

Have you ever met someone who has an excuse for everything? Do you ever just want to shout at them to "Take accountability!" I've been there. If something is bad, it's bad. I stop making excuses for people who are doing wrong and feel they can. In our society we have a set of people, leaders possibly, that can sell a desert to an Alaskan just by using reasons and excuses as selling points. 

3. Miss a chance to make a new friend(s).

As a woman, I need friendship. I crave a woman's perspective. However, maybe it's just me, but maintaining friendship can leave us stripped and vulnerable. If I'm quiet, that means I'm hurting. It doesn't mean I'm mad at you or an asshole. Many times in life I've had worries, issues, concerns, problems that I'm juggling. If our relationship is so fragile that my distance leaves you raw, then you're probably not my friend anyway. This is why I feel it's necessary to branch out. Take risks. Be the one who makes the first move. Trust me, there will be a lot of rejection, but in friendship it only takes one good one to make your world shine.

4. Pretend I don't need help.

This sort of is attached to number 3. I know a person who feels very vulnerable accepting help. Okay...it's me. I've always found it difficult to reach out and ask for something. There have been moments when I've been suffocating in responsibility and refused to ask someone for their advice, help, or a simple hug. When my kids were first born (I had preeclampsia with both girls) I was so sick. I had no energy. I wasn't eating (because who had time). NO sleep (I was breastfeeding). And dealing with the symptoms of a high BP because mine hung on like a feather on tape. I look back and think why the hell didn't I ask someone for help? Or accept the help I was offered?  Or the times I struggled getting my kids where they needed to go. And the time I found a knot in my breast (turned out to be a cyst) and what I wouldn't have given to have the support of one my friends. Maybe I would have been rejected, or maybe I wouldn't have been. Unless we ask, we'll never know.

5. Kiss ass.

Yep, and there it is. Do I need to explain further? Probably not so I'll leave that right there.

Rhonda Lee Carver is a bestselling author of contemporary romance novels. She is the proud mother of three wonderful children and admits on a daily basis that she "doesn't" have life figured out.