Thursday, April 28, 2011

What Do Men Want ?!?!

When men and women argue is their brain on the same level? Hell no. Don't ever send text messages back and forth with someone you're arguing with.If all the texts actually make it to the other person, which what are the chances that thay do, the meaning behind the conversation is lost. Why? Because men and women think completely differently, especially during a heated discussion. And without the facial expressions, tone of voice and the look in a person's eye, well, it's a disaster. I wonder how many people have broken up over a "text argument." Do it right people. If you must argue, do it the old-fashioned way--face-to-face.

Now, back to the focus. Do men and women argue differently? I found a diagram from that I thought laid it out perfectly.

I'm not sure if you agree, but it's definitely pretty interesting...

Wednesday, April 27, 2011


In English the word love is thrown around to describe anything that pleases us. But have we lost the true meaning of love? Is it no longer a word that describes the deep emotions shared between two people? So, if love is used as a broad term, what seperates love as in "I love pizza" and "I love my ONE." In today's world when people say "I love you forever" and it really means "I love you until something better comes along or we argue" maybe it's time we search for the concept of true love.

What do two people who have shared forty, fifty, or more years together have between them that keeps them together? Is it possible they have a trick that other couples lack? Or, is it a stubborn character that they refuse to allow "life" to defeat them? When we look at it as a whole, what breaks couples up? Temptation of an affair. Finances. Insecurities. Kids. The everyday mountains and hills of life.

Last year I met someone and he introduced me to the word "Ahava." As I did my research, I found that it is a lovely word with such deep meaning.

Ahava is a Hebrew word meaning "I give." and "Love." Therefore, Love is giving. The more we give love and the more we receive love the stronger the connection grows between two people. Makes sense, right? But what's important here is not receiving love, but giving--that is the secret. Giving is the vehicle of sustaining love. Not just giving our lover love, but ourself the love we deserve. 

Take a look at the relationship we have with our children compared to the one we have with our significant other. No, I'm not saying that the dynamics are the same in the two relationships, but there are similarities. We love our kids unconditionally. They misbehave, we understand and we still love them. Most of the time we sit and discuss their behavior. When they're sick, we nurture them. When they've had a bad day at school, we offer support. When they're scared, we cuddle them. When they're hungry, we feed them...and through all the pain we suffer with them, and anyone who has or had a teen understands the pain all too well, we still love them deeply. And a child's love is given so freely. Children see through our misdeeds and issues. 

Now, take a look at your relationship with your partner. When you argued last did you understand, or try to understand, his/her point? Did you get angry, throw in the towel and walk away? When your partner was sick, did you quarantine them to the bedroom and lock the door? When he/she reached out, maybe not in specific words, and told you their fears, were you too busy to sit and listen...really listen? When you saw your partner's shoulders slump from the weight of sadness or daily events, did you offer comfort?

Love is never easy. However, love is contageous. Giving can be the glue that ties two people together and the strength to weather the storm.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Love Stories of History...

Is there such a thing as love at first sight? Do you believe in soul mates?

The most famous lovers ever--Romeo and Juliet. Is there anything to learn from this famous couple? Two young teens meet and fall in love at first sight. Against the wishes of their feuding families, they marry. When they face losing one another they take their own life. Is this true love or has time molded it into a tragic love story?

Another famous love story--Antony and Cleopatra. Learning of Cleopatra's false death, Antony throws himself upon his sword. Shocked to learn that her husband is dead, Cleopatra soon follows with the aid of a poisonous asp. Not only does she die, but two of her aids who were dedicated to her also died. As she wished, she was buried along with Antony. Tragic or insane?

Many other love stories follow...Lancelot and Guinevere. Tristan and Isolde. Paris and Helena. Orpheus and Eurydice...the list goes on and on of love and its tragic loss. The tale is woven that each of these couples shared a love that many of us strive for.

Is it the tragic way these relationships came to an end that draw us to their stories? Or is it the deep, unconditional love that these stories are famous for? For a person who has ever loved deeply and has lost that love can relate to the torment of these lovers. No one can ever be sure how history has played a part in the glorified love story of couples like Romeo and Juliet, Cleopatra and Antony and the others but I'm certain that most of us want to experience this forever love, even with all the risks and torment. Even with the possibility of a tragic ending. To love someone so deeply, so passionately, that they are the breath of our lungs, the life in our veins, the beating of our heart.

So I ask again...Is there such a thing as true love? Soul mates? For those of you who have loved, you will say yes, even if your story is tragic.

Monday, April 25, 2011

Sexy-Recipe Monday

Champagne Poached Peaches--sure to put your man, or woman, in the mood for love.

Fresh peaches poached in champagne need to be tasted to be really appreciated.
  • 2 large ripe peaches, preferably white
  • 2 cups dry champagne
  • 1/2 cup maple syrup
  • 1/2 small vanilla bean
  • 3 large strawberries
  • 2 tablespoons powdered sugar
  • 1/4 medium lemon, squeezed for juice
  • 1 cup Romance Whipped Cream, see recipe
  • 2 large mint leaves for garnish
Make a very light incision all around peach skins. Plunge the peaches briefly into boiling water, then into cold water, and peel. Place in a shallow pan and douse with champagne. Add the syrup and vanilla bean. Bring to a slow boil over low heat, and poach peaches at about 185°F, but do not allow to boil. If peaches are very ripe, they will be poached after 5 minutes.
Place peaches and syrup in a cool place, but do not refrigerate. Drain peaches, reserving the poaching liquid. Wash strawberries, remove any leaves, and purée in a blender or food processor. Place in a bowl and stir sugar into the purée. Stir romance whipped cream into the strawberry purée and add lemon juice. Serve on round plates, or in glass dishes or small bowls. Line the bottom of the dishes with strawberry cream and arrange the cooled, but not chilled, peaches on top. Garnish each peach with a mint sprig. Serve the chilled poaching liquid separately in a sauce boat.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Cheap vs. Expensive

As I stood in the personal care aisle pondering the vast choices of razors for women, I questioned, "Do the more expensive razors work better than the package of 6 for $1.00?" I've teetered back and forth between this. I grabbed the expensive. $11.00 for a razor. Yes, that does seem rather on the expensive side but it did come with a gift...a travel size deodorant and shaving cream. This razor is the cadillac version of all razors. Easily held, movable head, and has a row of four blades. Luxury in personal least from the shelves of WalMart. I can't wait to try it.

Continuing along the aisles, there is always two or three choices of everything. And, of course, they put the most expensive brand at eye level because if you are a speedy shopper you'll make a bee line to what you see first. I'm not the thriftiest of the thrift shoppers, but I do like to leave the store feeling as if I got a bargain. Who doesn't??

There has been an ongoing battle here in my household about ketchup--cheap vs. expensive. I stick by the expensive. Other members hold steady to the cheap brand. It comes down to thickness. I like mine thick, not runny. Yogurt is another--cheap vs. expensive. I am a sucker for Dannon Greek Yogurt. Once you go Greek you don't go back. None of the others can stack up in comparison.

Now, there are products I always buy the cheap. Mac N Cheese. No, nothing compares to homemade, but if I'm in a hurry the box stuff works in a pinch. I'm not talking the blue box...I'm talking the 50 cent brand. And sour cream?!? Can't tell a bit of difference, not even in the creaminess. Canned coup and wins.

Okaaay, back to my razor. Because I like proof in quality, I plan to put this caddy-style-hair-remover to the test compared to the just-shave-and-call-it-a-day version. I look for no cuts (can't stand the sight of blood), no afterward itchiness, lasting smoothness, and easily cleaned.

And for those who think all razors are made equally--you're soooo mistaken. I'll keep you posted.

Monday, April 18, 2011

Sex-Recipe Monday

Recipe submitted by Jessica Meyers. Thanx, Jessica.
Sexy Kabobs.
2 cups tomato juice
1/2 cup butter
onion powder
1/3 cup ketchup
1 teaspoon mustard
ground black pepper
garlic powder
1 tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
1 dash hot sauce
2 pounds beef sirloin, cut into 1 inch cubes
can of mushrooms mushrooms,
1 large onion
1 large green bell pepper
8 skewers

1.Add everything together let soak (preferably overnight)
2.Place everything on kabobs.
3.Grill. Baste if desired. (can cook in oven and they still taste great)

Not healthy in the least bit but everytime my husband takes a bite he says Mmmmmhhh. No it's not sexual but men love steak and it's always great to feel responsible for making a man moan.

Would have messages your author page but didn't see the option so hopefully you like it and it's helpful here so you can transfer over or whatever else you need to do with the recipe.

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Marketing...Sex Sells

I'm a romance writer. I write erotica. Therefore, I hope, I know a thing or two about sex. And what I do know--sex sells. If you're picturing me in leather and lace with a spiked collar--I won't burst your bubble. Again--sex sells. I won't mention the comfortable jammies...

My focus here is not the leather and lace--sorry.

Marketing. When I hear this word I cringe. Why?? Haha...I wonder how many writers sell their first book and say 'Hooray. I'm rich now.' How many others are laughing along with me? I won't tell a soul if you admit you've said this. Writing a book is only the first step in seeing it reach the hands of readers. As writers we just wanna write, right? We could do this, but we won't get very far. If I calculated the time I spend between writing and marketing, marketing would tip the scales. I'll be the first to admit, my marketing skills are lacking. Good thing I'm learning as I go.

One of the biggest things I've to learn. Yup, you read right. Some of the best advice published writers give to aspiring writers is, "Learn from others." Same in marketing, "Learn from others." Writers are smart. Do you think a writer is only clever in creating a hot storyline? It's amazing how we network. Learn from the best.

Blogging...blogging...blogging. Did you read that? BLOGGING !!! Writers have the awesome capability of juggling. Writers are managing three, four, five or more blogs. Amazing. That's all I can say.

Facebook. A social network that, I won't deny, occupies a huge chunk of my daily time. Twitter. The name alone makes me wonder...


Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Writing habits.

When I sit down to write I like complete silence. No tv. No music. No noise...and especially no talking. This is how I work best. But having two young children and a cat and dog, this can be a difficult task.  Another issue I have--setting a number of words a day. Once upon a time I'd sit down, laptop at hand and type away until my eyes crossed. I was finding though that on some days I didn't have enough motivation and my writing would pay. Let's face it--working at home takes dicipline and I needed a good jolt of scheduling. So, now, each day as I sit down I set a goal for myself. Not each day requires the same amount of words, but there is something rewarding about setting an amount and meeting it--an incentive. I don't set strict goals for myself because in turn, if the goal isn't met, I am bummed--not good for the writing ego.

I am always curious where writers write. For myself, I like the freedom of choosing a different location--one that fits the mood. One day I hope to have a screened room where I can sit in the morning and ponder over my latest romance while I listen to the birds chirping, watching the sun rise--offering a new day of possibility.

For some writers, music is an inspiration. Heavy metal, soft rock, classical...take your pick. Some like to have a movie playing. Others may have a certain time of day when they're most creative.

How do writers write?

Monday, April 11, 2011

Sex Recipe Monday

Recipes to make him go "ooh-lala."

Peppermint Bark

This recipe takes 10 minutes to prepare, 8 minutes to cook and after sitting overnight, it's ready to be fed to the ONE. Makes 2 pounds.

2 cups peppermint candies, crushed
1 1/2 pounds melted chocolate (can use white if you prefer)

1.Melt chocolate in microwave (remember: I don't want you to work harder, only smarter. Save your energy for seduction) Work at 30 seconds at a time so the chocolate won't scorch.
2.Pour chocolate over candies in a bowl. Stir gently. Then pour mixture onto greased cookie sheet. Let sit overnight to harden.
3.Break into pieces and store in airtight container.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Delaney's Sunrise

I just finished edits for Delaney's Sunrise. Although edits were grueling and my editor, best editor ever BTW, kicked my ass, I loved molding this story. I love my characters.

Dee, a saucy heroine that knows how to win her cowboy with a flirty smile and down home cooking.

Abe, a hero built tough and treats life like a rodeo--grab it by the horns and wrestle it to the ground. Gotta have those secondary characters.

Melissa, what she loves more than the men of Willow Creek is her blue eyeliner and big hair.

Mitch, a true cowboy that has a heart the size of Texas.

And what's a little mystery without the villain? I could tell you loads of ooey-gooey information about this character--but I won't. about a little juicy morsel? O-kaaay...You won't have a clue who the villain is until the last chapter. You'll be on the edge of your seat, curious and bewildered--trust me.

Delaney's Sunrise Releasing 6.20.2011

Thursday, April 7, 2011 for the soul.

What is it about grocery stores that brings out the flirt in everyone? Why join a dating service when you have a Kroger down the street? Do you find yourself gazing across the store aisle, seeing someone and thinking "Oh" Do you stop there, walk away, satisfied with a glimpse of eye candy?

Or are you the type that catches his eye, holds his gaze for five breathtaking seconds, before pulling away. You then toss your hair over one shoulder and demurely tuck a loose strand behind your ear.

Maybe you like the thrill of the game. You dig in your purse, frantic to find something--anything--to write on. You come up empty handed. That doesn't stop a girl who knows what she wants. With a tube of lipstick, you jot down your digits on your palm and hold it up for his view. Even better, not for the faint at heart of course, you stroll over to where he is perusing the canned beef stew, take his hand, and write your number on HIS palm. With a purrrfect smile and seductive tone, you say, "I make a mean stew." Then walk away. You don't even need to look to know his tongue has dropped to his chin. If anything, you'll be remembered as the sexy woman who made a man's day--probably his month. The best scenario--he calls you, you two hit it off and he turns out to be the man of your dreams. What's the harm in trying, eh?

Fact is, if you've had your heart broken, or just had a lousy week, there is something uplifting about a flirtateous smile sent your direction or an interested look from a hottie. Sure, it may not cure the ex-boyfriend-lover-bad week-blues, but baby steps, right?

Where is your fave place to flirt?

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Mr. Right ?!?!

Someone told me today, "You'll find Mr. Right." Fact is, there is no Mr. Right, and no Ms. Right. If I wait for Mr. Right I should just get used to the idea of being alone. Mr. Right means a man has all of the qualities I'm looking for--bring out the party hats and balloons cause we can live happily ever after. Are you laughing yet?Even in my romance novels, a relationship takes effort and conflict exists. The rainbow is there but you have to make it through the rain first.

What makes more sense, "Mr.-worth-working-hard-to-make-it-work." Sure, not as pleasing to the tongue, but honest.

Anyone who has read my books is aware of the issues and baggage my characters carry. Whether physical flaws or personality issues or emotional damage, I like to keep it real. Expecting someone to come without "issues" is like saying you'll never argue or each day is like a pig rolling in mud.

Find the one worth working through the issues. The one who makes you laugh because the laughter will get you through. The one who makes you forget that life and love is not all flowers and good times.